How Much Do I Share With My Boys About My Teenage Years?

While driving around today we were discussing a song on the radio. Zack told me that Cop Car just hadn’t grown on him even though he’s heard it hundreds of times and I made a remark that it was because he hadn’t fallen in love in the back of a cop car. He then replied that he’d never been in a cop car. Heathen amended that statement and said he was able to “play around” in his uncles cop car. He then turned to me and asked if I had ever been in a cop car. I replied “of course! The front and the back.” Then a voice from behind asked me why I had been in a cop car and I had a mini panic attack. I had forgotten the boys were in the car and could hear our entire conversation! I fessed up and told them I rode in the back when I was picked up for curfew violation. Of course we had to explain what that was to our boys.

Then Zander got started asking me all doers of questions and I was faced with a dilemma. Do I tell them the whole truth, an edited version of the truth or just plain out lie to him? I decided that honesty was the best and told them that I wasn’t a great teenager and was in a lot of trouble. Since we were in public I decided not to elaborate and to fully end that discussion. Knowing Zander, he will begin quizzing me at random times to find out all the facts. He’s smart enough to wait until we’re alone at home so the discussion can’t be avoided.

Looking back at my teenage years, I am amazed that I survived them. I don’t want to tell my boys that it was ok for me to act like that but it’s not ok for them. I want to help them choose the right path themselves, instead of me pushing in the direction I want them to go.

What would you do?

About Jennifer

I am a stay at home mom of three boys who relies on caffeine to make it through each day. My boys Zander (9), Quentin (7) and Brody (5) make sure to keep life interesting and full of challenges! I have been a volunteer with American Youth Soccer Organization Region 49 for over 13 years. Read more about me here.


  1. Tough question and considering I don’t have kids I’m not sure if it’s the best advice or not… I would go with the truth but wait until they are older and fully understand what you’re talking to them about. Explain what you did and why it was wrong or not.
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    • Jennifer says:

      I figure they’ll understand where I’m coning from if I’m honest with them. I’ve experienced a lot, good and bad, and I want to share what I;ve learned from my mistakes so they don’t make the same ones.

  2. Wow I hadn’t thought about it this way. Interesting….I would think that by being honest it helps add validity to your discipline if that makes sense. You have the experience behind it. So they might be more likely to trust your judgement? I would hope. LOL

    • Jennifer says:

      I hope they’ll trust me a little more or at least understand where I’m coming from. I’m so not ready for my boys to grow up!!!!

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